Search This Blog

Friday, March 28, 2008

Monkey Ex Machina

Thank you Dixxx for sending this fabulous video my way. Funny and clever yes, but more importantly it will give The Blob readership and me ground floor entry to a new turn of phrase that will no doubt enjoy common usage within a short time.
The "Trunk Monkey" as evidenced by the clip is the driver's best friend, capable of resolving any tricky situation. Not only is it easy and fun to say but it's competition: Deus ex Machina is an ancient, elitist, and ungainly mouthful.
In Greek and Roman drama, they used a god lowered by stage machinery to resolve a plot or extricate the protagonist from a difficult situation. Today we use a monkey, not to denigrate God (don't the Hindus have a monkey God anyways??) but because it's funny. No blasphemy intended Dad!!
As somewhat of an amateur lexicographer I find it rather exciting to bear witness to the birth of a new idiomatic expression but that's just me. Now we will never be confused as to the origins of Trunk Monkey and a decade from now can pontificate knowingly at cocktail parties when the topic arises.
Having just used the expression "bear witness" (which I believe originated from the Goldilocks story) leads me to ponder on the genesis of other common animal related turns of phrase.

  • A "dog and pony show" now means a pathetically contrived or overly intricate presentation, put on for purposes of gaining approval for a program or policy. It used to be an actual small travelling circus featuring dogs and ponies!!
  • Someone who's been "Cold cocked" has been rendered unconscious by a sharp and unexpected blow to the head. The actual origin of the phrase is unclear but many (not me though!!) think that it has something to do with Eskimo sex.
  • "Bitch Slapped" is also controversial with Wikipedia offering up 3 possible explanations. I always believed it to have been associated, at it's inception, with the Pimp/Ho relationship and I still think that's the most valid. Currently there is no accepted tie-in with female dogs.
  • "Cat Fight" on the other hand has everything to do with cats but now means a scratching and hair pulling brawl usually involving two women who ideally end up at least 1/2 naked and in suggestive positions (see: upper chest straddle) . These often occur in prison yards and communal showers or in girl's dormitory locker rooms. True to Blob tradition a video link dedicated to catfighting is up and coming (don't worry guys) although with the new policy it will be parent friendly. It has some of the most exciting fight music ever written....I hope you enjoy it.


Mr. Pibb said...

As usual, you keep us on the right path literature-wise, Blobby. You got the schmarts, kid!

Love your blob!

underworldprincess2008 said...

Ya, monkeys are hilarious. Can I just say one thing though: Come on!! This is totally a testament to what we as a people, have become. In the pit, no one talks about this kind of self-aggrandizing crap. We care about letting loose, having a cocktail and fingering a bunch of nazis in the ass. Why don't you ever write articles about that?? Why, I'm laughing right now just thinking about it! We don't wanna hear about your problems with your parents or how funny and cute some monkey with a crowbar is. We care about sin!! We care about sex, drugs, rock n roll, jazz trombone, the x-files (season 4!!), band marches, britney spears' commando limo rides, etc. If I wanted to hear about my moral leader staying in some poor schmuck's basement, I'd seek out Saddam Hussein's last will and testament.

Nah, I kid, but seriously. Sin. That's all that the kids on Satan's Creek wanna hear about. Just something to think about while your better half, Troy, is out scoring more pot (or Star Trek collectors items (eww))

Yours in diabolism,

UnderworldPrincess ('08!)

slapper58 said...

As a Jew I have some difficulty with your last comment....why do the dead nazis get to have all the fun???!!
Please tell me that the fingernails are dirty and jagged or have been filed down to a razor's edge.
That being said you do make a compelling case for me to move out of Troy's basement and get back into the business of not caring what my parents think.
At a certain point in any man's life he will face this dilemma and I now believe I am at such a crossroads; Do I honour my parents and post material that will do them proud or do I honour my readership (especially the hot,female,cleavage-y readership) who look to The Blob for amoral guidance. Yeah, I hear yah.....pretty much a no brainer.
I'll see what I can do.

Mama C said...

Yeah, it's time to move on. Think of all the 'artists' who have done B movies to make a living while waiting for that one career-making role of a lifetime. Their parents probably had to watch them pretend to have SEX on screen (or possibly just recite really crappy dialogue), just to support their darlings in their quest for (self-)discovery, etc. It's much the same thing for you, only you're just photo-shopping T & A, and putting in lots of suggestive comment. Tell your folks, if they complain, it could be worse!

slapper58 said...

"just photo-shopping T & A, and putting in lots of suggestive comment"?????
Mama C, what about all the socio-political observations, the religion bashing, new product listings, my youth counselling program and the rebuses...what of the rebuses???!!
You may argue that they're all included in The Blob to give it an air of legitmacy and that my main agenda is the promotion of sophomoric sexual humour. Fair enough but each post, no matter what the topic, remains a labour of love. Some nights I sit here and inspiration can be hard to come by and mornings, for some reason, can be harder still, incredibly hard!
You're right's time to move on but first to sleep(perchance to dream about Catherine Zeta Jones).

Maria Callous said...


slapper58 said...

Don't you be dissin' my girl C.Z.
So what if she married a rich turtle!!

Maria Callous said...

I was actually referring to your incredibly hard morning inspiration. Don't expect me to think about that without throwing up.

slapper58 said...

Maria, Maria,
Throwing up is a bit harsh as far as reactions go but I guess gagging is not unheard of.
I wasn't expecting you to think about my inspirations. You're an opera singer...I was barely expecting you to think period.