The modern woman, or "neo woman" works first and foremost for herself......we're women and you can't live without us!"- Felicity Muffet
For those of you who haven't checked the comment section let me debrief you (said the vicar to the altar boy). A male contributor pined for the good ol' days when women were subservient and compliant sexual partners and men could focus solely on their own pleasure. This prompted several letters of protest and these women, true to their 21st century nature (red, in tooth and claw) fought back with noticeable ferocity.
Since the dawn of time men have been trying in vain to win the battle of the sexes. Indeed it can be reasonably argued that the great monotheistic religions in their original orthodox manifestations have "keeping women in their place" as one of their main raisons d'etre.
In it's essence this is a classic supply and demand situation much like today's oil crisis. The Arab states have us over a proverbial barrel because of our dependence on them for our fuel needs.
Men need vaginas and women have them...it's as simple as that. Sure there are prostitutes but they can be a health risk not to mention the expense. Men by and large aren't that bright and fool themselves into believing that sex with a woman in a relationship is free. This of course is a laughable delusion that we are prepared to overlook every time some gland shoots a miniscule drop of "I'm horny" hormone into our bloodstream. For all the talk of "the weaker sex" vagina power can bring down empires and cause powerful dictators to whimper and beg like babies.
Despite Felicity Muffet's jackboot approach to sexual politics I like to think that it's best to leav
e antagonism out of the bedroom. Yin and Yang or balance is the obvious solution. Over the course of a few liaisons the giving and taking should just about even out or there will be trouble ahead. (I guess that goes for housework too) This trouble can take so many forms that I won't bother to bore you with the list but John Wayne Bobbit would have done well to heed my advice.
e antagonism out of the bedroom. Yin and Yang or balance is the obvious solution. Over the course of a few liaisons the giving and taking should just about even out or there will be trouble ahead. (I guess that goes for housework too) This trouble can take so many forms that I won't bother to bore you with the list but John Wayne Bobbit would have done well to heed my advice. In lieu of balance I've found that living 4,000 kilometres away from my dearly beloved creates an over-riding sense of longing where indiscretions are more easily overlooked (hers anyways).
.....Did I just sat thay??!!?? (damn, am I in trouble!!) Honey I was just joking I swear!!!
9 comments:
Is that supposed to be a Donald Trump doll Mike is holding on the book cover? If so where can I get one?
Dixxx
I love you Blobby. You are a photoshop artiste extraordinaire.
There you go mike, so proud...so...so proud, always knew you were a natural. lovexxx
Anonymous (possibly Dixxx),
What happened to Mikexxxster??? Are you suggesting he has been hurt by commentary/photoshopping and has gone into hiding? Please Mikey...come back!!
Blobber! I most certainly have never "pined for the good ol' days, when women blah, blah, blah, and men yadda, yadda, yadda their own pleasure." I assure you and your readers that I am a thoroughgoing Sensitive New Age Guy!! The quoted passage is funny because it is historically authentic, yet utterly ridiculous according to our current social mores (I can't believe I have to explain this!). The last sentence in the post was meant to be ironic!! In case you and those "ferocious" women were not aware of it , we are smack dab in the middle of The Age of Irony!!! It seems that I may have to modify The Mikester Early Warning System to take into account the use of irony. From now on, in addition to the number of x's in the name Mikexster (which of course indicates the sexual content in the post), the number of i's will give an idea as to the degree of irony intended. I remember talking to Mama Callas one time about driving, and she happened to mention that she was a "dab hand" with a standard transmission. I recall saying to her (IRONY ALERT!! IRONY ALERT!!! THIS IS NOT A DRILL !!!), "what!?!? a pretty little gal like you can drive a stick shift??????" I assure one and all; she laughed out loud!! See??? A little bit of irony can be a very useful tool!! Blobophiles!! Try it some time!!! It's easy and it's fun!!!! A final thought, just to set the record straight-some of my best friends are women (you've come a long way, Babies!!!)!!! And now, if you'll excuse me, I must go and make (all by myself!!!) a cup of tea (Felicity Muffet seems HOT!!! How can I meet her???).
Mikexxxster!!!!! No need for any sort of alert. I merely picked up on the controversy you en-gendered and amplified it as is my wont (not to mention right, privilege, and God-given duty).
I agree that irony is essential to modern day life and here at The Blob it's the very butter that I slather upon my quasi-daily comedic scones. The comment section is clearly a love fest where irony and goodwill abound. The "angry chicks" were being ironic, I was being ironic, you were too...it's all good!!
Sorry Mikexxxster, your little Miss Muffet has a boyfriend. His best friend is his treadmill and he only eats fruit and finger-food. She keeps him in her basement.
Mike, Mike, MIke. Calm yourself. Everything is fine. We love you. We always have and if you play your cards right, we always will. I don't need to reiterate what Blobbie said, so I won't, since he put it so well. I was quite amused by the section of that book you quoted but at the same time, the attitude in question was at one time the norm and in some parts of the world still is. THAT disheartening fact is what I was addressing in my own ironic fashion. See? Let Irony continue its merry reign of this Blob!!
We need less Irony and more Ironing!
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