Hope for the Hopeless

Is your kid an under-achiever?...a social outcast with little or no self-esteem?....untalented and unmotivated?....in short a loser?

1. If this sounds all too familiar then I'm sure that you as a parent have reason to fear for his future. "What kind of work can there possibly be out there for a kid like this?" you've asked yourself countless times, no doubt looking ahead now that you realize his childhood is a total write off. (Important note to my own children; This does NOT apply to you....I won't have you quoting this post to your shrink in 20 years time.) After doing a bit of typical Blob type research I've come across a vocational placement agency that specializes in just this sort of thing. PERDO SERVICES has a list of several jobs and their respective required aptitudes that will put your mind to rest. Here are just a couple:

• Insecurity guard- Minimal contact with public and a uniform that bestows a somewhat unnatural sense of self. Must enjoy doing nothing punctuated by periods of stasis.

• Un-stable boy - Work extensively with horses who will never mock you or try to dissuade you when inevitably, the voices in your head start telling you to light fires.

...and that's just the tip of the iceberg! So folks, there is hope after all. As Leo Tolstoy once noted; "If it weren't for losers there'd be no winners." How right he was! (I know, I KNOW....I was listening .....now where did I put those damned matches??)