Nothing could be further from the truth and only a true artist can consistently evoke the proper colors from this unappreciated, three-sided gem of an instrument.
In the orchestra, the best composers have long known where to turn when a woodwind chord need to be given that shimmering, ethereal boost or a rousing brass fanfare needs a glorious, jubilant, and silvery brush stroke to truly deliver the spirit of the moment! It's the humble triangle to the rescue time and time again.
With this in mind The Blob is glad to announce that another new sponsor has joined the fold. Isosceles magazine is a serious publication dedicated to all aspects of the triangle arts. They never shy away from tackling even the most controversial issues. Here's a brief exerpt:
Do Jews Make Better Trianglists?
It's long been contended that Jews make better lovers. It's an established fact that they make better husbands...thousands of years of oppression and servitude have had their effect. But what about the triangle? Can this cultural baggage produce beneficial results in this realm as well?According to Alan Abel, the legendary trianglist with the Detroit Symphony, the answer is a resounding yes! "The triangle is an outcast in the orchestra, ill considered and annoying to some but always a soloist and always heard, no matter how loud the rest of the group is playing.
With the history that we Jews have it makes us ideal candidates to properly play this little instrument. Mahler would only have Jews play triangle whenever he conducted...he understood. Today the finest trianglist is Robert Slapcoff, a Canadian Jew. http://www.radiobremen.de/kultur/dossiers/kammerphilharmonie/blog128.html
Is it just a coincidence? Do we make better triangle players? Who am I to say, but listen...it couldn't hurt!!" ...
That's just the kind of well crafted, insightful article that Isosceles magazine provides for it's loyal readers, four times a year. Get yourself a copy today!!
14 comments:
Blobbeleh,
I congratulate you on a magnificent perfoahmance at the Deutch Grammaphone thingy. I couldn't be happiah than if my own son Mordecai had been invited to play his tambourine.
And you know, you ah certainly right about the Jews being bettah lovahs. My Jonathan was the most attentive and active mensch in the boudoiah. Even on his deathbed he would beckon me closah just to whisper, "Esthah dahling... you want a little rub out before I go?". Maybe there's a triangle story in there somewheah, I dunno. Do what you can with it and be a good fathah... I think I've had too strong a nightcap, I don't know what I'm saying anymoah...
Keep the cultuah!
E.E.
Esther...your husband...is he dead?? Just asking ;o) (get in line Mikexxster)
Blobbeleh, I am so happy to finally hear something positive about the triangle, long my favourite of the percussion instruments! I've already sent in my $29.99 for a year's subscription to Isololes...Iscoleles..Icsolees... well, you know... that magazine. And if only I could read German, I"m sure that article from Radiobremen--right next to an article about Michael Jackson, I notice! (Talk about a brush with greatness--I've got goosebumps!) would be highly entertaining! Thanks awfully!
BEST BOLB EVER, Bolb!!!
Wonderful stuff! But tell me... this Sidney Abel of whom you speak... is this the same Sidney "Sid" Abel who played with the Red Wings for all those years? Are you telling me that my Production Line buddy, ("old Boot Nose, to his hockey pals!) was also a CLASSICAL MUSICIAN??? No wonder he never went into the corners...
Gordie? You're still alive too??
Listen...I was trying to avoid a lawsuit. The guy's realname is ALAN Abel not Sid. Rumour has it that he's very litigious(most of the stuff in that article is made up but let's just keep that our little secret) and I'd rather take one of your fabled elbows to the gut than face him and his voracious lawyers!
Any comeback plans??
Nah, Bolbie, I'm done... the game's changed too much... it's a girlie-man's game now, know what I mean? These guys are just businessmen now, eh, and their business is "playing" hockey... kinda makes me sick... don't get me started!
Yeah, I know what you're sayin' about lawsuits... trust me, I know all about that... if only you could settle these things on the ice, eh, with one quick, powerful elbow to the smart-ass opposing lawyer's ugly head, ideally when he's not lookin'... or when he is, smash his smirky, pretty-boy face to a pulp with your fists in a simple, honest, one-on-one fight... why, I bet even Eric Nesterenko could handle these panty-waist poofters!
But I guess the good-old-days are gone, eh, Bolbie? Anyways, thanks for askin'! Keep you stick on the ice (AS IF, eh, Bolbie???)!
your pal, Gordie
Any idea who the art editor for Isosceles magazine is, Blobber? That delicious cover is to die for! Simply devine!!
You are so handsome in your white tie and tails, my friend, why, sometimes think I should just get it over with, and switch teams (haha! Just kidding, as always, of course! My plate is pretty-darned-full already! Pleasing the ladies, don't you know!), if you know what I mean! Yowzza!! Lord have mercy!!
Umm, btw... who's that cute, funny fellow in the short clip, Blob? Inquiring minds want to know!!
Toby
Amazingly awesome fantabulous post, Blob, as usual, I must say!
I've never been prouder to be an almost semi-professional trianglist!
And now, enough of this idle chit-chat... I must go and practice (tonight, I'm working on Liszt's piano concerto #1... I'll be working on getting that patented, beautiful Slapcoffian "silvery sound"! That's going to be my ticket to The Show, you see!), because that's what makes us trianglists perfect, don't you know! Onwards and upwards, wouldn't you say, Blob?
Hey, Bolbie! How's it hangin', eh?
I feel like I'm a 25 year old kid again, eh? You ever play a game called crokinole? It's friggin' awesome! It's a game of skill, but there's also a fiar bit of trash-talkin' intimidation goin' on (no elbows though, sad to say!)... my partner and I just kicked ass big time, my lazy friend! Plus I drank a whole shitload of beer (it's been a while, eh??)!!! WHOOOOOOOEEEEEE!!!!!
It was kinda like my partner and I just pulled the sweaters over our opponent's heads (just a coupla no-talent losers, really, but still!!) and we POUNDED the BEEJEBUS outta them losers until the refs had to break it up because they was gonna get hurt, big time! Hahaha!! Really!! It was just like that!!! I feel so alive agaain! Maybe i WILL make a comeback... let's face it... Syd the Kid's a damned cry-baby pussy, an' Oleg Ovetckin's (whatever!!) a loser chiken-shit commie Rooski!
Hey Bettman, you pint-sized little FUCKIN' SHIT HEAD!!! I"M BACK!!!!!!!
Thanks Bolnie! And now, i'm kinda tired, maybe irt's time for bed!
Gordo (king of the corkinole!!!) Whooo!
Well, I been waitin' an' waitin' for some kinda response from them crokinole (a Canadian game btw, just like hockey!) losers to defend themselves eh, but I'm guessin' they must be from Qweebec or Euorope, or somewhere like that, eh, 'cause no good Canadian boy would put up with that kinda talk, wheather it's from Gordie, or any body else! I guess they're still on thier knees with thier arms coverin' thier pretty little heads or sumthin' like that, pretendin' that thier turtles... "oh, don't hit me no more Gordie! Don't hit me no more!" Makes me sick! We don't want thier kind around here!
WAY TO GO GORDIE!!!
Hey, Don. My grandmother's kitchen curtains called. They want to be reinstalled in my fuckin' grandmother's kitchen.
Peace ooot.
Ya see, Blob? That's somethink like what I been talkin' about! OK, folks... finally... someone who ain't afraid to stick thier nose in there, eh, an' ain't afraid of a little bit of pushin' an' shovin', an' mixin' it up a bit! Them crokinole candy-asses between the two of them don't have half the cojones (is that how ya say it? I don't know, I don't speak Spanish or Italian, or whatever it is... what??? oh, forget it!! ) that Maria has! Ya just know she's a good Canadian girl too, eh? Probably from The Soo, or Sudbury or somethink like that... I bet ya she ain't afraid to go into the corners neither, eh, and I bet she comes out with the puck mosta the time too! Maria, you can play on my team, any time any place!
WAY TO GO MARIA!
Do you have any recommendations on buying alphorns?
HW
Well, Harry Whole, you know what they say... "the lights are on, but nobody's home"... it seems our friend Blob is quite busy these days... you know, important stuff, such as baking cakes, etc., etc., ... (do yourself a favour... don't ask!)
As a regular Blob contributer, I feel that I am more than qualified to fill in for the Blobmeister (as I'm sure he would want me too...)... how hard can it be, right? I mean, COME ON!!!
Anyhoo, after a GREAT DEAL of research, and the consumption of JUST the right amount of delicious beer, and, most importantly of all, as a "blechblaser" of some standing myself, I've found what I believe is the right instrument for you!!
The Osterreichische Alpenfahrt 5000 is what you're looking for, my new friend!!! Played by hundreds, loved by millions! Enjoy, Harry, and, you're welcome! (You too, Blobber! It was nothing... really!!)
B'ster
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