INTRODUCTION:
"The Alphorn, hewn from a single carefully hollowed and bent tree, is considered the most majestic of wind instruments both visually and for its elemental sound. Indeed, it was this very sound that was imitated by the great Richard Wagner in his prelude to Das Rheingold, the 1st opera in his Ring Cycle."
MY STUFF:
Hey annoying sports fans and pathetic trend followers, put away those vuvuzelas. Aging hippies and New Age world music wannabes, pack up your digeridoos. The Alphorn is making a comeback and hipsters all over Europe are riding the wave. It's only a matter of time before North Americans are lugging these sexy behemoths to raves, concerts, and the hottest parties and after parties. Check out this action from Vaterlandpalooza with the babelicious Hofmann sisters :
And let's not forget the even hotter Eliana Burki and her rock/funk approach to the shepherd's horn (you will fall prey to the siren song as have I!!) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RsRE_wp-n-E&feature=related
For those with a more traditional bent there are still Alphorns aplenty to be heard the way they were meant to be and where the only bare legs belong to bearded men wearing lederhosen.
I couldn't help but notice that "Alphorn" sounds a lot like "all porn" so next post will be more related to the latter than the former. This will no doubt rile Mrs. Nan Wilkinson who still seems to be on her crusade to steer me clear of anything remotely sexual (I think it was she using an alias, who asked about the alphorn in my comment section). I contend that I know my audience way better than she does (75 repressed men in Saudi Arabia can't be wrong!!) so stay tuned.
8 comments:
I've said it before and I'll say it again: Germans are the best!
Ummm, Adolph? Mr. Schicklegruber?
Remember 'way back in '45, when my Soviet People's Army was in the process of destroying your Third Reich, you said that the German people were not worthy of you, and that they were the cause of your defeat? Remember that, do you? Just asking...
Jiminy Crickets! Pardon my French, but those Rhine Maidens are so gol-durned sexy (you know, kinda like football cheerleaders... they're there, but ya don' know why, really... but yet it's OK, somehow!)!!! I guess this opera thing's alright, after all!
K R
Liebster Blob,
Danke für solch einen erleuchtenden Pfosten. Wir Schweizer sind auf unser nationales Instrument und alle schönen Frauen ziemlich stolz, die beschließen, es zu spielen. Haben Sie den Witz über zwei Lippen auf meinem alphorn gehört?
Danke.
Herr Hohl
WHAT'S GOIN' ON AROUND HERE, ANYWAYS?
What's with all this foreign jibber-jabber talk? Makes ya wonder just who won the war, it seems ta me...
Don, I'm with you all the way!! I don't get it and I don't want it!! That's all.
Herr Hohl, he is on feuer!
I notice the videos that prominently and extensively show individuals playing the long and solid pieces of wood that are this great German instrument depict exclusively women. This is a clear and classic - almost textbook example of penis envy, and I would like to thank this "Bobbenzie Slapkoffner" for his astute reporting and furthering my research. I think I shall be paying a visit to some of these Alphorn-playing women; they might be interested in playing my own long German piece of wood...
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