has probably been with us since the industrial revolution. There will always be a small percentage of the population who are deluded dreamers, tinkering away in their basements hoping to make the world a better place and to get rich while doing so. They are by and large a harmless lot unless you get cornered by one in a bus shelter and when left to their own (wacko) devices usually remain rightfully anonymous.
Trouble starts when such an inventor finds an even crazier investor who is willing to buy into their scheme and part with bundles of cash. A couple of inventions caught my eye recently (1 by way of a TV commercial and the other from a news report) that to me at least, and pardon the alarmism here, seem to be a signal for the end of days.
Let's start with Salad Spritzers from Wishbone
. Yes it's exactly what you think it is and I can hear the collective sigh of relief as you think to yourselves "Finally...now I can spray my salad dressing on instead of pouring it!!!" Call me old fashioned but spraying is meant for the deoderizing of armpits, the cleaning of stoves, killing earwigs etc. but not sassing up your lettuce. Was there a huge problem people were having controlling the liquid to vegetable ratio that required this bizarre solution? Maybe years from now when everybody is gleefully spraying their frigging salads I'll admit I was wrong but until then my motto remains "Once a pourin' man, always a pourin' man!"
The next product points to a problem within a problem that may set new lows for catering to a niche. I like to imagine the pitch given to the would-be investors....."Ok, so there are like millions of chronic gamblers worldwide and because of their desperate addiction they become like super consumers if the product can help them towards that big jackpot. Imagine you've been sitting at a slot machine for 4 or 5 hours and you still have half a bucket of coins left. You' ve been working it and the big payoff may happen at any moment but...oh no!!....nature is calling. You can't lose your machine now!!! If only you had an absorbent and comfy adult diaper that could be used again and again and not one of those bulky, scratchy, disposable ones that's so bad for the environment. Ladies and gentleman I present to you the Adult Reuseable Nappy!!"
Feel free to make your own joke about the craps table while I try to figure out slogan...how about "What happens in the diaper stays in the diaper!" Anyways if any of you are chronic gamblers or just simply very lazy follow this link http://kitchener.kijiji.ca/c-buy-and-sell-health-special-needs-Adult-Cloth-Diaper-Diapers-Night-time-Incontinent-NEW-W0QQAdIdZ12886735 There's a real product out there for you.
STOLEN RECIPE CORNER
Speaking of salad dressing I found a store bought one that I love, Wafu Japanese Style, but since it's very expensive I just copied down the ingredients and went back to my test kitchen where I concocted a perfect knockoff for mere pennies a bottle:
12 tbsp canola oil, 4 tbsp rice vinegar, 4 tbsp water, 1 tbsp light soy sauce, 1/2 tbsp sesame oil, 1 tbsp sugar, 1 clove garlic (minced) 2 tbsp chopped onion. Combine ingredients and place in blender for about 1 minute, refrigerate, thank me.
2 comments:
Ah, the blob, how I've missed you! All is right with the world, now that I'm back on your revered pages!
With that in mind, here's a question for you: is it mean to ask for a loonie at a mental institution? Respectfully submitted by Travis, via Viv.
Interesting.....a rather innocuous question but in these politically correct time one that could be taken the wrong way. Would you ask someone to scrub your back in a prison shower?? On the whole I'd advise caution and restraint.
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