Posts from the Edge

Here I am back at my parent's house stationed in front of their computer. Familiar sights and smells abound...a favorite sofa, whimsical knick-knacks, time worn carpets imbued with faint hints of long dead pets and a thousand casseroles. It's all strangely comforting and yet I feel untethered....my own computer is back in the shop after an unfortunate attempt at re-installing Windows XP that included a minor short circuit and an unresolvable Catch 22 type situation. My old room that I shared with my brother is now my parent's office and the computer sits in the exact former location of the bed that some 30 years ago I abandoned in favor of the couch in the den and unfettered late-nite access to the TV.

2 days ago I felt optimistic about getting my comp up and running but after my dismal failure I can't shake the overwhelming feeling of despondency. Sure the days are getting longer and warmer but today is bleak and grey. The rain is helping to melt the snow and leaving behind a winter's worth of thawing, swill- like residue. A stench hangs over the city like a wet elementary school curtain as I sit here, forcing myself to write, trying to fend off the suffocating, fetid darkness. I must find cause for hope....soon the comp technician will call....maybe the news will be good. It's election day here in Quebec. Later I will cast my vote and hold my head high as I participate in that most sacred of democratic privileges and duties. Then there's that coupon for 1$ off on a DQ Blizzard that's burning a hole in my pocket. If oreo/banana can't turn my mood around then nothing will!!

Taking a break from typing I part the faux wood/melamine blinds that had only seconds ago shielded me from the outside world and look up see the sun struggling to pierce the thick layer of stratus. The old lilac tree, still dormant, is now a temporary roost for a handful of wrens who chatter excitedly about surviving another winter and on the nearby sidewalk a gnarled old man horks up a glistening slug of phlegm before he boards the #104 bus for destinations unknown. He is choosing his path and I must do the same....Ah! My cell phone beckons....it must be the repairman with the good news!!